Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
