You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize