also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
