We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize