the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
