Well douche your snatch and let's go!
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
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