i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
this hospital has no fireball
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize