what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Randomize
