I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Mom said you looked used
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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