You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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