Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
