I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
