Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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