I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
