And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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