you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
