maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
