I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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