No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize