Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Randomize
