I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
where are you?
Hypothermia
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
