I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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