I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
