I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
