Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
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