white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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