Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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