I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
