I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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