best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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