I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
