i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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