I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
