I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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