my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You need Xanax blowdarts
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
