WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
