roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
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