i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
