we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Randomize
