Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
