Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Let's get the cat blown out
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
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