ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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