Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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