girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
