So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
