nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Randomize
