idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
