I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
