I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
