I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
