mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
