u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
